“Were you dropped on your head at birth?” is a common insult used to imply that a person is acting foolishly. It suggests that the person’s poor judgment is the result of a, usually hypothetical, early childhood head injury. But this was my reality.
At 18 hours old I was dropped on my head from my hospital bed. I sustained a fractured skull and a subdural haematoma. Doctors prepared my parents for my death. And if not death, long-term effects – learning difficulties, motor skill problems or epilepsy.
So yes… if you’ve ever met me and thought, “She’s special”, now you know why.
But somehow, I survived. I believe my life was spared for a reason and I decided my survival wasn’t something I would waste. And that’s where the training began, not only training my body but training my mind. It made me wonder why we put so much pressure on perfecting our bodies, yet rarely invest the same care into our minds.
We spend hours training our bodies. Lift heavy, but don’t look masculine. Run fast, but don’t lose your curves. Grow your glutes, but starve yourself so your abs pop.
We’re taught how to tolerate physical discomfort for the pursuit of a “perfect” body. It’s normalised. It’s celebrated. We literally brag about it. We post it. #No pain, no gain.
But emotional discomfort? We avoid it. We do everything we can to distract ourselves from it.
And if we can’t distract ourselves, we doom scroll. We stalk. We judge. We ask for honesty but reject the truth. We listen to psychics and read tarots. And that’s the part that never made sense to me.
Because if our brains are trained by what we tolerate… what are you teaching yours?
What you tolerate consistently becomes familiar. And familiarity feels safe even when it’s toxic. Mental strength isn’t about pushing harder. It’s about knowing which discomfort is worth sitting with… and which is a signal to say bye-bye to.
But knowing isn’t enough. You need to practice it. Like any muscle, your mind needs daily workouts to build resilience and clarity. Not once. Not when your horoscope says it’s your day. Daily.
Here are five simple ways to start training your mental muscles:
- The Egg
Growth rarely feels good. You might outgrow routines, relationships, even who you used to be, but this space makes room for what’s next. Grief and doubt may surface but sitting with them builds resilience.
Try this today: Write a short letter to something you’re letting go and turn the page. - The Crack
Your mind becomes what it practices. If you practice distraction, you strengthen it. If you practice presence, you build clarity.
Try this today: Pick one task and give it your full attention. - The First Shed
Each time you trust your instincts, you strengthen self trust. Ignoring them reinforces doubt. Notice what you need, act on it, and prove to yourself you can handle the outcome even when it’s uncomfortable.
Try this today: Reflect on a decision when you ignored your instincts. What would be different if you trusted yourself? - The Soft Skin
The voice in your head doesn’t have to be harsh to make you better. Choosing gentleness over shame builds real strength.
Try this today: Write a note of kindness to yourself.. - Reborn
Walking away from what drains you strengthens your mind. Staying in what hurts builds tolerance for discomfort. Small steps toward alignment train you to choose growth over pain.
Try this today: Pause. Is this for your growth or your comfort? Act from alignment.
Your mind, similar to your body, gets stronger with practice. Strength isn’t about perfection, it’s about choosing yourself, even when no one is watching. Start small. Choose growth. Repeat. Over time, your mind will become a muscle that can carry you through the toughest of workouts. And honestly? A situation-ship won’t break what a fractured skull couldn’t. Because yes, I was dropped on my head at birth. But I refuse to spend the rest of my life dropping myself.
By: Livologist, Olivia Fletcher
